Relationships: Look past the past

2 years ago Comments Off on Relationships: Look past the past

“Reach for the stars, over the fence, world series kind of thing,” sticks, doesn’t it? Great movie too. A beauty only expressed through extended metaphors with mental imaging artistry. A feeling incomparable and seemingly unattainable in an era of climbing individualistic pride and popularized hurt.

No force 2016, I campaigned in my last article to date, championing the innate actions one does not need to devote a life of work to in obtaining the romanticism we all pour over heart throbbing lyrics for some relatability and self-proclaimed quick fix articles of opinion, hopelessly searching for what’s been going so very wrong and how to keep the right things going right, of course. A stress reduction method is what the movement, to lay claim to a stronger defining term, truly serves as, allowing the most right things to fall into place in a way that is naturally preventative for the wrong things to.

Though, in all this there still exists problems.

Sheesh, right?

Just when you thought you’ve found a solution to your Bryson-Tiller like issues more variables to account for arise as if inevitably. One namely that tends to go over the heads of many as a real discrepancy is the socio-cultural norms amongst a wide range of people.

Simply put, there are different strokes that exist for different folks. These strokes that feel so common but in reality come up in other conversations on the opposite end of the spectrum.

As in the case where while some may deem some slight physical interaction to shake you up a bit necessary, others will consider it an immediate red flag to get the hell out of, dodge, quickly.

Other situations that plague our lives follow suit with this explanatory reasoning than most do not realize until in the midst of an argument with their significant other or much later when they cannot seem to find a solution to their issue and it’s told to them by a concerned outsider looking in.

So, what? Is the question right. What is the point?

My point is that what works for you in your relationship should not be comparably tried in another situation, as an instantaneous assumed strategy. Just because when Mike rubs Trina’s head and pats her tummy when she’s frustrated with him and it works in favor of the overall health of them as a couple, that does not mean that will work for anyone and I might add, does not make it abnormal either.

Anything that lies within either of the environments of the people within the relationship, like say an unaddressed traumatic event, could serve as the reason for the way a person is going to act within a relationship.

That being said, one must consider in that same regard the factors existent in our current society that elicit adaptable traits involuntarily taken on by us all. The things about you, you don’t remember acquiring as a trait, or learning. Many may understand this in a way that creates these differences on a basis of race, ethnicity, label, label, label, yada yada yada, but no. It all boils down to the patterns you’ve come to adapt to in life, well as far as what I’ve taken the time really notice in the relationships of friends, family and myself of course. It is those patterns that create the basis for those stereotypes within those labels.

I won’t attest to an opposing a view, but I will venture to say as much as take a look into the depths of your past yourself. Past relationships and your own developmental past as well as the factors affecting you now. It just may shock you, but let it be growth. Truly, knowledge is power (Yes I am a firm lover of cliché phrases) and any and all things I’ve said above could be your power against another misunderstanding you have with bae Thursday night at 10pm right before ya’ll hit the streets trying to escape each other in the moment.